Trying

The funny thing about trying

is that you have to attempt it

attempt to get up

attempt to have a purpose

and attempt to try to make the day doable

I tried and succeeded to get up before the alarm

I got my clothes on

put my headphones on out of habit

no music is playing just a habit

I managed to walk a young and an old dog

I managed to try to feel something

what I succeeded in doing

is to create tears

I created a tightness in my chest

my throat

all the while you don’t see it because I’m good

I’ve mastered this face

I’ve breathed through my unease

I’ve taken More than I should

never did I fight back that hard

unless I’m at the tip of the ledge and I’m about to fall

the fall is not what sets the fire

it is the voidness

the wrong mess of things

I’m attempting to stay quiet with my tears

I don’t want to be pushed into talking

I hate the feeling of just watching

but my mouth does not want to move

my thoughts are running a mile a minute

I’m trying

but no one really sees me

the last one who seen me left

added value to my life

then poof like smoke

I’m gonna keep trying

I hope I don’t break anybody